My hands and other sore subjects

My hands are giant, they are longer than most men’s
But they are not man hands because
They are too spindly and weak
They are really very weak
I cannot give massages or open most jars
Or even snap my fingers
And I am sickly proud of this fact
Because no proper lady should have man hands
Come hang out with me in the park
We can chat about life and shoot the shit
But I might clam up when you
Talk about love
Even abstractly
I mean yeah
We’re friends
Dude
We’re certainly friends
But the kind of friends who
Don’t talk about the people we’re seeing
And probably shouldn’t trip together
Or text each other shit like “haps v day”